Confession: I’ve been watching Survivor since the beginning. When it started 25 years ago, I was 17 years old, watching on rabbit ears with the two whole channels we got since we never had Cable TV. I’ve watched every season. Tonight was different though. As I sat watching the Immunity Challenge, I could see what was unfolding, but little did I know how much it would resonate with me. Watching the scene between Eve and Joe brought me to tears. How Eve talked about how her parents advocated for her, got her the services she needed to be where she is, and sometimes, things still affect her. She stated how her Autism wasn’t a barrier, it was part of who she was.

I didn’t know I was neurodivergent until the age of 40. I’m still learning how to handle things when life gets too much to handle, when I break down. This week we have seen unprecedented attacks on services for people with disabilities. With the attempted dismantling of the Dept. of Education, attacks on funding for special education in public schools, and the fact that I am having to fight to just survive, since I lost my job over a month ago.

I’m not giving up, but I am going to start speaking out, and advocating for those who are different in this world, and the people who are kind, like Joe was in that moment. ADHD is part of who I am. Yes, sometimes it means I get in my own head, and need someone to just listen. Yes, sometimes it means I get super emotional at a seemingly small thing, but every single day I am working to manage it better, even if I can’t manage it 100% of the time. I am learning, and will continue to learn and find my place in the world.